Gandhi Jayanthi – Shave the Head, Save the World

7 October, 2009 at 13:15 Leave a comment

It is a habit of mine to get head shaved every quarter. One is free to see it as a fashion statement of a partially bald(ing) guy or lazy convenience of getting used to low maintenance or doing away with scraps of historic remains of a once great society of hair et al. It is a routine but this time around it happened at a different barbers on Oct-1. When I was paying the 10-rupees (or 20c), the barber declined saying that it was rare to see a guy following Gandhian principles in this age. You see, he got me and the timing confused because it is Gandhi Jayanthi on Oct-2. Here was a guy in a shack with a broken chair who must have had a full sqaure meal maybe, during one of the marriages of his cousins and he was declining hard-earned pay because he was impressed. If only, bankers had these kind of principles we would not be in the mess we are today. I told the barber it was nothing like that because I did not really like Bapuji and that I was shaving my head because I like it that way. And oh, I did pay him 20-rupees for the interaction…

On the way home, I could not help but ponder about Gandhigiri but soon, with the wind hitting and gliding across a freshly shaved scalp, the mind wandered about benefits of a shaved head. I had an epiphany of sorts that if everyone shaved their head, we could save the world and the gears were in motion to put together a “Top-10 Reasons” like the ones seen on David Letterman show. I checked with Bing just to be on the safe side and apparently, obvious really, someone beat me to it, as always. Here is a Squidoo collection on shaved heads and here is a Devil style guide combined into a short list followed by some of my own proven theories –
* You are going green and use less shampoo and lesser water and no hair dryer
* You need not ever be scared of the elements again – wind, fire, rain and 2 more
* Women absolutely love to stroke a bald head. The shinier, the better
* You can improve the aerodynamics in any sport and save fuel while on a bike
* You dont need a mirror nor comb nor worry about wearing a cap/hat nor dandruff
* It is a better insurance against old age. No worries of grays or thinning hair
* Ever wonder why mannequins are all bald? Because it is cool to be hairless
* You save time. Time is money. Money is power. Skinheads are powerful people
* Less frequent bathroom cleanups. Less hair on soap. No more clogging of sink
* In India, shaved head is the best option for pollution, dust, sweat and what not
* All advanced civilizations are bald. No aliens and future evolved humans have hair
* Help the economy. Hair is a natural fibre and packing material. Less plastic used
* 40% of heat escapes through head. Bald heads dissipate it better. Am just cool
So, a shaved head or a bald look is not just monetarily sound and ecologically stable but it is also future proof. It is said that the next big wars will be fought over water and so, if you are one of those world-peace types, shave the head, save the world. (drumroll) For those vanity fairies, it has to be shoved that hair (and nails) are nothing but dead tissue. They are the farts of the body metabolic processes. That is the reason we dont feel any pain when hair is being cut and styled and so on. So, it is sad to give importance to hair. Off with it. Finally, Gandhi has maintained a shaven head look for most of his life. Apparently, he has said somewhere that this has saved him immense time. I concur. Who has time to write such posts, eh? and I dedicate this to all bald people. Be bold. Live with dignity. Shave those scraps.

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    Entry filed under: Climate, CWorks, Economy, Energy, Health, India, Life-Theories, News-Media, Politics, Poverty, Silly-Point, Sports, Stand-Up.

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