The GU’d Life -12 – Pub Energy

6 December, 2004 at 14:01 Leave a comment

GU'd Life - 12
I should dedicate this alternative form of energy production to K and N.

I would have written a paper but I have not explored enough to see if all this was environmental friendly. And if it is not, you are in big trouble from the People’n’Planet society here. Yes, all 3-4 of them. I do know that it is economic friendly (such a project would be funded by pub-chains and beverage companies for sure as they can put it under their social marketing budgets) and any kind of reusable energy is good. But putting on my engineering hat, I have to say that a more accurate feasibility study which takes into consideration the RMS output of our speech signal, the Y-displacement of typical dance moves, the Wattage of our romantic interludes et al. has to be carried out by someone equally as crazy as me. Pity that science is still limited to producing energy from physical things because if we ever invent something that can produce energy from the degree of non-sensical and directionless small-talk and chatter (I will not be led into a debate about the prominent color in the drawing as it is somewhat vulgur), we would never ever have to make wars so as to get to oil wells again and justify it under the name of liberation!


Anyway, to me, pubs are interesting places to be because I like a free exchange between individuals and gracious me, they will be less smoky in 2 years time. It is strange to be frank, because in UK there are rules on smoking and drinking (pubs here close at night unlike other European countries which I reliably guess is the reason why there is still an exchange of students), but the government actively encourages gambling by having a national lottery and bookmakers. They even have advertisements almost as if they believe that one vice cancels out the other.


Coming back to pubs. They are microcosms of life in this country. No matter which pub you go, you see the same things. People bantering, guzzling and flirting away while watching football. But it has to be said that there are important skills to be picked up in pubs. One is to hear (amidst all that noise and loud music). Second is to appreciate (the finer points of female anatomy amidst so much beauty). Third is patience (while waiting to be served). Fourth is to tolerate (stupidity and violence). Fifth is to concentrate (on what topic is being discussed because they change quite arbitrarily). Sixth is to make graceful exits (when conversations are not going where they were intended). Last but not least and the vice-number seventh is to control oneself (from urges and instincts). Suprisingly enough, this is Buddhism but with a different intent! Now, that is cute and I wonder if one can put these skills in a CV –
“Hobbies: I go to pubs every single instance I can”.
Whether this is viewed as a skill or not, it atleast shows honesty of the individual. That is quite a rarity these days.

But seriously, joking apart, Scotland has to into pub-energy production, because otherwise the future of this country looks bleak. Not enough industry (if you count out putting stuff into boxes and answering phonecalls) but hopefully much beer and incoherence and liesure and therein much energy!

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The GU’d Life – 17 – Christmas Images GU: Volunteers for the 2005 Special Olympics

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